The Power of Now - Kerry

"Learning to live in the moment stops repetitive behavior, based on past memories of the physical body, that keeps you imprisoned," Alice Christenson, "Yoga from the Heart"

I resisted the urge to answer my cell phone as it rang in the car. I had careened around one too many corners trying to vainly fumble for it. I had swerved into the wrong lane, almost hit pedestrians, and taken wrong exits all while trying to answer the phone or talk on it. It was time to go back to the 1980’s, when I learned how to drive cell phone free with both hands on the wheel.

How many times did I need to repeat this behavior before I did something about it? I have conditioned my mind to multi-task, hoping I could simultaneously talk on the phone, drive, speak to my children and scroll through ipod selections.

I have driven up and down the I-5 corridor between our two houses in Ashland and Portland approximately twenty-two times this year, mostly because my sister-in-law was dying from breast cancer and to manage our rental. My head is simultaneously in either locale with my parents and childhood friends or with new Ashland friends and a fantastic writing group. I am torn. This is not a natural state of being. The present moment, or simply just focusing on one thing at a time, was completely lost to me. I was running scared.

Until Mother's Day, when I was brought forcefully into the present moment with my son's comment, "Mom, I'm glad you're not dead."

I pondered his remark as I glanced at his cousins, who had lost their mother just over a year ago. Brought up short by the power of now, I put down the phone as I got into the car. I filled the house with fresh lilacs and noticed their intoxicating smell, their vivid hue of purple. I sat down and sent a silent message of light and hope to the victims of disasters in Burma and China. Then I started to write.